FET outcome

We had the frozen embryo transfer just over two weeks ago.  I started having pregnancy symptoms about 5 days post transfer.  Unfortunately on the morning of the beta test the symptoms went away again.  I knew it was another chemical pregnancy. 

It was confirmed when my beta came back at 12.  Two days later it was 9. 

I felt pretty devestated after the results.  I spent a lot of time crying and I felt quite distressed.  It seems that we may never have another child. 

I went and saw the psychologist at the clinic to give me some ideas of how to cope.  She was really helpful and validated all of my feelings.  It's been a very difficult 12 months for us, as our dreams and hard work to try to have a baby haven't paid off. 

We decided to take one month off and then do a final stimulated cycle.  The RE has agreed to increase my stims slightly so hopefully we'll make a few more embryos. 

After we have used the next batch of embryos and if we aren't pregnant we will have to think long and hard about how much more IVF we are willing to put ourselves through.  I never thought it would take 5 or more IVF cycles to fall pregnant again, but here we are.  And the reality is that we may never fall pregnant.

The RE remains opimistic which is good and also frustrating.  She urges us to keep going.  She reminds us that the two chemical pregnancies are a good indicator as the embryo is obviously developing beyond the transfer.

To be honest it's been very difficult to remain optimistic.  Hopefully this break will allow us to get our lives back and try to muster some hope again as we get back on the wagon.